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Author Topic: Caring for others with chronic illnesses  (Read 236783 times)

Offline annabel

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Re: Caring for others with chronic illnesses
« Reply #105 on: October 20, 2006, 12:23:09 PM »
Nellie, I'm so sorry for everything going on in your family.  There's really nothing else to say.

Offline mcnell1120

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Re: Caring for others with chronic illnesses
« Reply #106 on: October 20, 2006, 12:52:04 PM »
Nellie, I'm so sorry for everything going on in your family. There's really nothing else to say.

Awww hon, what you just said is enough...thanks so much...just pray for my mom..she's the one I worry for...for if she goes I will die...I saw my mother-in-law go in pain due to her smoking and her drinking....*sigh*

Nellie
RICKY MARTIN ,tu eres mi Kiki !

Offline mcnell1120

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Re: Caring for others with chronic illnesses
« Reply #107 on: October 20, 2006, 12:52:44 PM »
Conny, Nellie & Neil - So sorry for what you're having to endure (been there, done it once already, which will be a possible post for another day) and now 5 years into a similar situation with my Mom).  It takes a toll on a person being on call 24/7.

Hugs and love to each of you.



(((((((((HUGS)))))))))))))

Nellie
RICKY MARTIN ,tu eres mi Kiki !

Offline conny

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Re: Caring for others with chronic illnesses
« Reply #108 on: October 20, 2006, 01:39:20 PM »
(((hugs)) for you too Glenn,i know about your mom,you take good care of her!!
"we are one,but we are not the same"   U2

Offline brianr

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Re: Caring for others with chronic illnesses
« Reply #109 on: October 20, 2006, 03:35:11 PM »
Hugs to each one of you with suffering loved ones. I totally agree with the thoughts on smoking. My dad went because of it and although the specialist did not agree I am sure the pulmonary fibrosis that killed my mother was a result of passive smoking. Had lunch with a gay ex-student yesterday. He told me his father has pulmonary fibrosis and has 6 months to live, His father is now 84 and gave up smoking at age 40. Not only is his father suffering but Rodney lives in Germany and is torn between staying here in Sydney with his father and seeing his business in Munich go to pieces. I am so angry when I see young people light up. I think smoking should only be allowed between consenting adults in private  :)

Offline conny

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Re: Caring for others with chronic illnesses
« Reply #110 on: October 21, 2006, 01:26:20 AM »
i have smoked on and off for almost 15 years,but one day i kept on having pain in my throat so much and then it hit me,did i wanna a chance on living for the next 20 years,or did i wanna die in a few,so i quit immideatly and never had any trouble with it ,and it`s 5 years ago now. i dont allow people to smoke in my house,and wont stay in houses where will be smoked.
for the rest it`s other people`s buissness,i cant tell them what to do or not,and they prabably wont listen anyway. i didnt when i still was a smoker,i knew it was bad,but i had to get that real warning befor i realy listened!
"we are one,but we are not the same"   U2

Offline whiplash

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Re: Caring for others with chronic illnesses
« Reply #111 on: October 21, 2006, 04:11:50 PM »
I'm torn about posting this here... Please let me know if it isn't appropriate. 

I have been consumed by such emotional pain that I have decided to try and rid myself of the harmful thoughts, by putting the pen to the page.  I have been keeping a journal on pen and paper and decided to put it on the computer.  Working through the lines and trying to make them readable to another person, I think, is helping me sort through the pain. 

Just thought I would share it here http://mydabda.livejournal.com/

Incidentally, the letters DABDA are for Elisabeth Kubler-Ross' five stages in the acceptance of death: denial, anger, bargaining, depression, acceptance.
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Re: Caring for others with chronic illnesses
« Reply #112 on: October 22, 2006, 04:38:24 AM »
I'm torn about posting this here... Please let me know if it isn't appropriate. 

I have been consumed by such emotional pain that I have decided to try and rid myself of the harmful thoughts, by putting the pen to the page.  I have been keeping a journal on pen and paper and decided to put it on the computer.  Working through the lines and trying to make them readable to another person, I think, is helping me sort through the pain. 

Just thought I would share it here http://mydabda.livejournal.com/

Incidentally, the letters DABDA are for Elisabeth Kubler-Ross' five stages in the acceptance of death: denial, anger, bargaining, depression, acceptance.

It's ok! Left you a note there honey!

N
xxx

Offline mcnell1120

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Re: Caring for others with chronic illnesses
« Reply #113 on: October 23, 2006, 06:01:48 AM »
Okay...this is very hard for me to write, right now.....spent the whole Sunday with family...hung out with my mom for a bit and it was hard. She told me my aunt almost died Saturday...her body rejected some blood they were giving her,guess she's bleeding internally now. My uncle is in denial that she is finally dying. For him ,he thinks it's like always...she goes in the hospital every couple of months,and soon enough she's back home...not this time. He won't tell his daughter who lives in Alabama,how serious things really are. She was here in July for her birthday. My mom took the strength to call her Sunday and told her everything. She's flying in as we speak....

I told you I've been praying and praying for God to take her...went to church this Sunday and begged him not to wait any longer...and then I turned to my left and saw my mother looking up to the altar as if she was praying for the same thing.....I wanted to cry...it was very hard for me to keep my composure....I can't see my mother in pain...but I know I must be strong for her.

What's making it harder for me is that I haven't seen her in quite some time...I haven't the strength and now that she is so worse off,it's even harder. But knowing how my mind works,I think I need to visit her in the hospital just for my uncle's sake..for my cousin's sake....or I will forever regret it and it will be eating at me....shit !!

Nellie
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Offline conny

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Re: Caring for others with chronic illnesses
« Reply #114 on: October 23, 2006, 06:23:38 AM »
nelly,it doens`t matter that you havent seen her in a long time.
if you wanna see her and have the chance,then go for it!!!!! dont hesistate,listen to your feelings,you know what to do!!
and dont wait till tomorrow if you can do it today!!

my best friends father died all of s sudden yesterday,when she was on her way back home from a visit with me,and she never has a chance to talk with him ever again!  :'(

take care hon(((NELLY)))
"we are one,but we are not the same"   U2

Offline desertrat

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Re: Caring for others with chronic illnesses
« Reply #115 on: October 23, 2006, 07:34:40 AM »
nellie, i think it's rather brave of you to pray for her to be relieved of pain and suffering....a big hug to you !
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Offline fritzkep

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Re: Caring for others with chronic illnesses
« Reply #116 on: October 23, 2006, 08:21:53 AM »
Nildita carisima, you are always in my prayers, especially now. I pray for your needs, your intentions, and your health.

Werd ich zum Augenblicke sagen, "Verweile doch! Du bist so schön..."

Offline BrokenOkie

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Re: Caring for others with chronic illnesses
« Reply #117 on: October 23, 2006, 09:37:29 AM »
(((Nellie))) - thoughts and prayers are with you & your family.

Offline whiplash

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Re: Caring for others with chronic illnesses
« Reply #118 on: October 23, 2006, 05:35:46 PM »
I have been struggling with prayer for a couple of years now.  I feel like I just don't know what to pray for.  Do I pray for the person to get better and then they have such a horrible quality of life; suffering every day?  I can't pray for that.  So then I pray that the person will go quickly so they don't linger in horrible pain and I realize that the person is happy to have one more day with their loved ones.  So then I pray that their best intentions are considered.  And then I think, what the heck am I doing?  Driving myself crazy!!!

Nell - it is so hard to pray and hope for the welfare of another.  My thoughts are with you and your family and I hope the journey is soft on your hearts and light on your shoulders.
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Offline fritzkep

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Re: Caring for others with chronic illnesses
« Reply #119 on: October 23, 2006, 05:43:21 PM »
I have been struggling with prayer for a couple of years now.  I feel like I just don't know what to pray for.  Do I pray for the person to get better and then they have such a horrible quality of life; suffering every day?  I can't pray for that.  So then I pray that the person will go quickly so they don't linger in horrible pain and I realize that the person is happy to have one more day with their loved ones.  So then I pray that their best intentions are considered.  And then I think, what the heck am I doing?  Driving myself crazy!!!

Nell - it is so hard to pray and hope for the welfare of another.  My thoughts are with you and your family and I hope the journey is soft on your hearts and light on your shoulders.

It seems to me that the only thing you can pray for in such a case is to pray that whatever is for the best and whatever is right may happen, even though you cannot possibly know what is for the best and what is right. Your prayers will speed and aid what is for the best and what is right to happen, and they will also help you to understand what is for the best and what is right.

You are also in my prayers, whiplash.


Werd ich zum Augenblicke sagen, "Verweile doch! Du bist so schön..."