If it's "no one's business" then I don't want to hear about any straight person's marriage or having children or anything else about their lives, either. We should all act as though everyone is single and asexual.
I think that perhaps the phrase "no ones business" is less to do with "I don't want to know, don't tell me", and more like "it shouldn't even be a question most people consider".
Now, lots of people speculate as to Jake's sexuality, and this is understandable within this community. But if I walk into a shop to buy a loaf of bread, the question of my sexuality should never arise. It's not related to the context, unless the shop keeper develops a sudden crush on me (hey, it could happen. It
could. Okay, not
likely, but possible. Thanks buddy, my self esteem's in piece now
).
What does it really matter if Jake is straight or gay? Do we need to speculate on who is and is not a vegan? No, because it simply doesn't matter in most circumstances. I
think (and correct me if I am putting words into your mouth) that that was what was being said.
The biggest point is, if there is nothing wrong with it, there would be no reason NOT to speculate or talk about it or anything.
There's no reason not to speculate, except to respect the privacy of the person in question. It's not so much an issue of Jake's sexuality, as I see it, but rather that he has not chosen to make that information public.
I am grasping for a good comparison... let's see...
Imagine you walk into a shop, and I am the shopkeeper (or minding the shop for the previous shopkeeper, who talked me into it because it turns out they do have an enormous crush on me). Anyway, you wander past, say "hi" and go look at tins of beans. I may privately try and guess all sorts of things about you, because it is the nature of human interaction to want to get a few conclusions under our belt before we even get going. Straight or gay? Vegetarian or omnivore? Dog person or cat person? What kind of job might you do? Is that your real hair?
There's no harm in me speculating on any of these things. I might be spot on or waaaay off.
Now though, imagine another person wanders into the shop, and comes over to tlak to me. We greet each other and then I begin to speculate out loud to the new person: "See that shopper over there... what colour do you think their underwear is? What sort of music do you think they like?"
Now, black, red, white or pink, it doesn't make a big difference what colour underwear you're wearing, but that doesn't mean you are comfortable with it being a topic for open debate and discussion, right?
What I am saying is, private speculation is one thing, public discussion is a lot more likely to get a "That's none of your business" response. Hope that makes sense