THE ANGELS DO
DREAM OF COWBOYS
anybody in the camp tonight? hello,
been waiting for something to eat all day.
come down from the sheep and no one's around.
all i got is beans, and what in hell does pup tent mean?
this is a goddam bitch of a unsatisfactory situation. but it's all right.
ennis, you and me, we could have had a damn good thing going.
now i'm stuck up here in heaven with nothin to do but miss you.
can't hardly think of nobody but you. i miss you man, so much.
if i could, i'd come down with wings and say howdy and hello
but i got work to do here. there's a whole mess of suicides,
god says they were gay, god says i should help them out.
so, that's what i'm doin now,
keepin an eye on the new angels.
poor things, some have stories you would not believe.
parents hated 'em, teachers hated 'em, everybody.
some even said their brothers said they'd rather
have a dead brother than a live gay brother.
told me they felt death was the way out.
now me, oh... i never wanted to say goodbye.
loved life, and most of all, i loved only you.
i am sorry. i did fool around. you had no idea how hard it got.
went to mexico. fooled around with a couple a ranch hands,
one name a biscuit. yeah, cuz he was that goood, goddam.
met a trucker once too, name a dave, on the way home
from signal when you said we wouldn't meet up again.
you said that a lot to me, friend.
felt bad for not tellin you these things,
like i never told you about joe. lots of things.
yup, aguirre knew we was up there foolin' around.
he had binoculars on us ya know. big ol powerful ones.
i knew that, saw him watching you from camp one day.
yeah. that's why i said i liked doin' it in the tent. yup.
i was afraid he might be watchin us playin' around.
it was a lie about the ranch hand's wife, yeah, him.
that was randall. he was nice tho, had that voice.
you'd a liked him if ya met. he was a fine man,
funny wife, sweet, but damn, what a talker!
now this randall, oh i told him about you.
it's funny, how i would tell him all about you,
but never could i ever tell you, about him.
ya know why? you was afraid. goddam afraid.
your own shadow if it was gay, would spook ya.
so i kept quiet. randall was ok, you'd a liked him.
yeah. he was a nice guy, but you were my first love.
i loved you the most, friend. but you wouldn't let go.
goddam your daddy, for showing you earl in that ditch.
must have been hell on you, what, 9 years old? sheeeeeit.
my daddy, now he wasn't much better, i know you know it.
you met him, uh uh. yeah, i was with ya the whole time.
god said i could come down that day, did you feel me? i sure did feel you.
i was standin' right next to my ma. she still talks about you, you know.
yup, that was me that told you to go to the closet. you felt me huh.
i hid our shirts, my mamma knew about 'em, told her about you.
she knew, she understood. she promised to keep them safe.
now my dad, he knew too, when i was 14
caught me and billy in the barn that one day.
beat the crap outta me, he did. didn't say a thing
about nothin' to billy's old man. for that i thank him.
anyway, you look so pretty sleeping so soundly.
yeah, pretty. pretty sexy. golly i miss you so much.
i'm glad you let me come to you, come in your dreams.
look, you're gettin stiff. yeah, just like last night. whoo eee.
well gotta get back to my work,
god says there's a new boy up here,
from michigan. killed himself for bein' gay.
mom and dad kicked him out the house, twice.
but he snuck back in and grabbed his daddy's rifle.
damn he looks like you up on brokeback. same color hair.
i'll be kind, he looks so scared, even with all this light around.
but he'll be all right now. yes, everything will be just fine.
ok friend, will visit you again in your dreams, have a good day,
and by the way, alma jr. and kurt, their baby boy sure is beautiful.
ya know, even tho his name is russell, i hear you callin' him baby jack.
i sure do thank you for that.
so, goodnight my lover,
goodnight my friend.
see you around,
next time.
