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Author Topic: Sharing life's vicissitudes  (Read 90571 times)

Offline jack

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Sharing life's vicissitudes
« on: April 10, 2009, 06:17:21 PM »
vicissitudes...
successive, alternating, or changing phases or conditions, as of life or fortune; ups and downs: They remained friends through the vicissitudes of 40 years.
"through Seneca Falls, and Selma, and Stonewall..."

Offline jack

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Re: Sharing life's vicissitudes
« Reply #1 on: April 10, 2009, 06:28:18 PM »
i have had what the chinese would call "interesting times" for the past couple years, and i have shared much of it with friends here on the forum, in several different threads, most especially "caring for the chronically ill" or whatever that is called.  this has been enormously helpful as a vent, as a way for folks to know, all at once, what was going on, and for both support and practical advice.  i have also in the past shared in the pets thread and in the diner life's twists and turns.

in speaking with a friend who had been absent from her usual haunts on the forum, in large part because of changing life situations, i realized that it might prove helpful to have a thread solely for stopping by and and updating friends and acquaintances on not just the good or bad things happening, but on how we were surfing life's waves and turbulences, the better not to get out of touch.

much of life does not fit in one neat little thread, nor is relaying that limited to just people in one interest group.

i hope this thread will provide a sounding board for just such communication.

jack
 
"through Seneca Falls, and Selma, and Stonewall..."

Offline lovelyamazing

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Re: Sharing life's vicissitudes
« Reply #2 on: April 10, 2009, 07:02:49 PM »
Thank you for starting this thread Jack.

"much of life does not fit in one neat little thread, nor is relaying that limited to just people in one interest group."

ITA. I'm sure you'll find me on board here.

"how we were surfing life's waves and turbulences,"

I have been on a roller-coaster for some months now and I think so many of us have.
 :-* :-*
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Offline jack

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Re: Sharing life's vicissitudes
« Reply #3 on: April 10, 2009, 08:18:03 PM »
spill the beans then, maya.  i wanted to play a bit of catch up myself, but i usually have just a few minutes at a time on the forum, and i am a slpw self editor.

pretty soon i will settle for a bit and, as they say in hawaii, talk story. 
"through Seneca Falls, and Selma, and Stonewall..."

Offline jack

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Re: Sharing life's vicissitudes
« Reply #4 on: April 10, 2009, 11:13:50 PM »
not exactly the ideal circumstances to bloviate, sitting crosslegged on my bed with a (thankfully working) laptop in front of me and a cat determined to undermine the project by walking across the keyboard, but i'll manage a few details.

first, i am in a place somewhere between okay and scary, with a fraction better mental health status than i have had for the past i don't know how many months.  my mother's issues are no longer my issues, and she continues to do quite well for a lady with advancing alzheimer's.  she seems to have achieved a kind of contentment/happiness, and she is, as far as i can tell, safe for the remainder of her life.

i am now, finally, beginning to address my own life issues, and believe me they are a mess.  on the bright(ish) side, i have my social security coming in regularly, and because of the degree my mother's needs impinged on all my choices, i am poor enough to easily qualify for medicaid, which pays all the parts of medicare i couldn't possibly afford.  translated, i have mighty good health care, all things considered.  the down side is that if i should try to earn more money to rise UP to the poverty line, i would lose that protection, and food benefits as well.  stasis.

up side, i have an pleasant affordable apartment on the banks of the caloosahatchee river in the warmest part of florida that ISN'T stifling.  downside, my daily living skills, sketchy on good days as i got older, went out the window for the past year, and getting out from under the ton of extraneous memorabilia an chachkes and just plain mess, and the various wires, cords, headsets and electronic devices engendered by the computer age has been all but beyond me.

upside, during a recent unusually cold cold snap, i was invaded by a friendly homeless cat who has provided laughs and affection.  downside, it was an outdoor cat in florida, hence, fleas, which hve moved into the apartment, a VERY downside in florida.  upside, defleaing cat and house made cleanup and reorganization of my household MANDATORY.  downside, i have been at it a week and have only scratched the surface of the reorganizing part, although i have been moderately successful with the cat and apartment delousing.  indeed, having pilled the cat, bathed the cat, and recently clipped its worst claws, we have established that the cat does actually live here and is not passing through.

there is so much more tsimmes an tsurris including a motor scooter accident that may have reinjured an earlier rotator cuff repair and a weeklong hospital stay from a raging cellulitis infection, it is like 4 concurrent movies of the week.  i am waiting for it to start raining toads.

finally, more or less, we are past the darkest days, an the seasonal affect depression that has been kicking my ass for months is passing, and i have a bunch more energy to actually take these tasks on.

there is actually more, but enough is enough.  tomorrow is another day.         
« Last Edit: April 11, 2009, 12:41:33 PM by jack »
"through Seneca Falls, and Selma, and Stonewall..."

Offline Tigs

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Re: Sharing life's vicissitudes
« Reply #5 on: April 11, 2009, 02:42:48 AM »
{{{{{Jack}}}}}}

Sal  :-*
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Offline Sara B

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Re: Sharing life's vicissitudes
« Reply #6 on: April 11, 2009, 03:55:41 AM »
Jack, this is a really good idea for a new thread.  Thankfully, apart from a broken computer, my life's pretty nice at the moment, but I've thought in the past it would be helpful to have somewhere to go for a good moan.  You sound as if you've had a tough year, and I do hope your life will stay on the upward path now.  A cat, especially a flealess one :D, is definitely a good thing.
Sara
There were only the two of them on the mountain flying in the euphoric, bitter air, looking down on the hawk's back and the crawling lights of vehicles on the plain below, suspended above ordinary affairs....

Offline jack

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Re: Sharing life's vicissitudes
« Reply #7 on: April 11, 2009, 07:04:41 AM »
funny you should mention computers, sara.  last week i was sitting here with three laptops, two still in warranty, and none of them working.  i was quite mad, actually, and nearly lost 20 gigs of media files, much of that related to this forum or the brokeback effect in general.

eventually, i had o buy an external hard drive (i had to return the first one for exchange, as it wound up being defective) and returning the brand new dell, which i couldn't afford anyway, and sending my newish but troubled toshiba to the factory for a check up.

i also had to format and reinstall windows xp on my 3 year old averatec which is now running smoothly.  the new toshiba has windows vista, which is another story altogether.

"through Seneca Falls, and Selma, and Stonewall..."

Offline lovelyamazing

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Re: Sharing life's vicissitudes
« Reply #8 on: April 11, 2009, 07:22:50 AM »
funny you should mention computers, sara.  last week i was sitting here with three laptops, two still in warranty, and none of them working.  i was quite mad, actually, and nearly lost 20 gigs of media files, much of that related to this forum or the brokeback effect in general.

eventually, i had o buy an external hard drive (i had to return the first one for exchange, as it wound up being defective) and returning the brand new dell, which i couldn't afford anyway, and sending my newish but troubled toshiba to the factory for a check up.

i also had to format and reinstall windows xp on my 3 year old averatec which is now running smoothly.  the new toshiba has windows vista, which is another story altogether.



Jack that is quite a posse of problematic computers. I had enough fun through Feb with trying to recover data from my old dinosaur. The hard disk is still perched here awaiting another shot at recovery. At some point I just had to shut off that process and move into the future with my new computer but I guess I'll be circling back to it.

I like the idea of a kitty strolling across your keyboard. Cats have a calming effect on me. The neighborhood is full of them and I take time off just watching them when I'm agitated.

"Once in a while
someone comes along
and changes everything
you believe about yourself"

Offline jack

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Re: Sharing life's vicissitudes
« Reply #9 on: April 11, 2009, 12:47:35 PM »
here's what i know about hard drives, maya, besides the fact they make effective doorstops when removed from the tower.

as i understand it, as long as the wheels are spinning, so to speak, your files are usually obtainable.  should the drive be frozen, it may be possible for a professional to wring out parts of it.

i have three old hard drives (see what i mean) that i need to go through for old info.  i bought a device that acts like a cartridge player.  just insert the hard drive and it effectively becomes an external drive.   
"through Seneca Falls, and Selma, and Stonewall..."

Offline dahlia

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Re: Sharing life's vicissitudes
« Reply #10 on: April 13, 2009, 09:03:55 AM »
Nice thread, Jack.

(or, it would be, if only I understood half of what you write  :D)

Anyway.

A calm place, where you don't need to be updated about tons of pages? Why not?

And then, after all, we have been knowing each other for almost 3 years now....

Offline jack

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Re: Sharing life's vicissitudes
« Reply #11 on: April 13, 2009, 09:28:33 AM »
i know dahlia/daniela... so many of us only pass through from time to time rather than "occupy" a particular thread or category now that we lose track of one another... and i HATE to see such long term friendships fade away.

it is also true that sometimes real life becomes so demanding that our online time becomes limited.  i hope this will provide a loose knit way of keeping abreast of one another. 
"through Seneca Falls, and Selma, and Stonewall..."

Offline Sara B

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Re: Sharing life's vicissitudes
« Reply #12 on: April 13, 2009, 09:59:46 AM »
Jack, I've just finished reading Beyond Brokeback (for the first time - I'm a late starter :)) and today your name caught my eye there.  I think and hope that you've moved onward from that time?  That book has moved me in so many ways, and I know it's one I will return to.  I've been on the forum about 10 months now, and I love the feeling of just touching so many lives.

On a more trivial note, sounds as if you've had even more computer problems - they are soo frustrating.  And I'm glad you share a love of cats - we've got 2.
Sara
There were only the two of them on the mountain flying in the euphoric, bitter air, looking down on the hawk's back and the crawling lights of vehicles on the plain below, suspended above ordinary affairs....

Offline jack

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Re: Sharing life's vicissitudes
« Reply #13 on: April 13, 2009, 07:10:13 PM »
afore mentioned cat is sitting on my foot as we speak.  you'd swear we had been buddies for years.

life has been a trip since those lines were written, that's for sure, but many friendships have endured, although some have proved a disillusionment.  and life has surely taken me down roads i NEVER could have anticipated.
"through Seneca Falls, and Selma, and Stonewall..."

Offline lovelyamazing

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Re: Sharing life's vicissitudes
« Reply #14 on: April 13, 2009, 07:16:32 PM »
i have three old hard drives (see what i mean) that i need to go through for old info.  i bought a device that acts like a cartridge player.  just insert the hard drive and it effectively becomes an external drive.   

Hey! I am back. This is cool about the harddrive. We did connect it as an external drive but without the device. I need to look for this now.


ETA: " she seems to have achieved a kind of contentment/happiness, and she is, as far as i can tell, safe for the remainder of her life. "

Want to say this is such good news - the word "safe" used by you is very apt. It tells me that your anxiety is considerably reduced. I'm glad she is stable enough to let you disconnect and pay attention to your inner needs.

I have seen my own mother with so many physical ups and downs in the last months of her life. It's very draining for the caregiver to be in an endlessly volatile situation. When mom passed a part of me was actually feeling she was "safe" at last.

And Hello to Sal, Cally and Daniela  :-* :-* :-*
« Last Edit: April 13, 2009, 07:31:26 PM by lovelyamazing »
"Once in a while
someone comes along
and changes everything
you believe about yourself"