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Author Topic: Mourning Someone Who Has Died  (Read 689430 times)

Nick_F

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Re: Mourning Someone Who Has Died
« Reply #240 on: October 16, 2006, 07:48:31 AM »
Brunel

we have not "spoken" for many months, but am thinking of you.!

N
xxx

Bobbie

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Re: Mourning Someone Who Has Died
« Reply #241 on: October 19, 2006, 04:15:58 PM »
A fairly new member of the Forum, Brokeback Lovesick Diet thread poster, and local DC/VA/MD person "DeTina" just lost her mother on Tuesday 10/17.  DeTina is a delightful person who just makes you laugh and lights up the room.  I wanted folks to know of her loss to keep her in your thoughts.

Thanks, B


Offline BrokenOkie

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Re: Mourning Someone Who Has Died
« Reply #242 on: October 19, 2006, 05:10:16 PM »
Bobbie - thank you for letting us know.  Warm thoughts for De Tina and her family.

Glenn

Offline ImEnnisShesJack

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Re: Mourning Someone Who Has Died
« Reply #243 on: October 24, 2006, 07:27:16 AM »
thanks for the heart-warming update, my mother, before she became ill, was a spritualist healer and before that a part-time medium. (If that's possible LOL! but you know what I mean). I have lived with this kind of stuff for so long that it no longer surprises me.

I had no idea about your mother, Nick.

Do you think she has had something to do with you finding Rob then?  Perhaps she has channeled someone in the Spirit world to make sure you found someone to take care of you so she could pass on?  (How is mum doing, btw...?)
"And when he shall die,
Take him and cut him out in little stars,
And he will make the face of heaven so fine
That all the world will be in love with night."
~~Heath Ledger 1979-2008~~

Carol8159@yahoo.com

Nick_F

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Re: Mourning Someone Who Has Died
« Reply #244 on: October 24, 2006, 03:37:20 PM »
thanks for the heart-warming update, my mother, before she became ill, was a spritualist healer and before that a part-time medium. (If that's possible LOL! but you know what I mean). I have lived with this kind of stuff for so long that it no longer surprises me.

I had no idea about your mother, Nick.

Do you think she has had something to do with you finding Rob then?  Perhaps she has channeled someone in the Spirit world to make sure you found someone to take care of you so she could pass on?  (How is mum doing, btw...?)

So many of these type of questions go around in my head H, that I am no longer able to intellectualise an answer. The older I get the more I believe in fate and destiny. Not the immutable kind, but the softer "it all will come right in the end" type of destiny. That things happen for a reason, just that we may not be wise/astute enough to divine a logical or clear reason.

Ma is getting a little worse each day, and has started to become fatalistic herself. Her former beliefs/practice do not appear to offer her much peace or calm though!

Offline phrag3

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Re: Mourning Someone Who Has Died
« Reply #245 on: October 24, 2006, 05:35:47 PM »
The older I get the more I believe in fate and destiny. Not the immutable kind, but the softer "it all will come right in the end" type of destiny. That things happen for a reason, just that we may not be wise/astute enough to divine a logical or clear reason.


Nick,

I agree with you, 100%.

Dan

Offline Mejack

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Re: Mourning Someone Who Has Died
« Reply #246 on: October 24, 2006, 07:13:56 PM »

Dear Friends,
Permit me to quote myself from Page 1 of this thread, posted way back in May . . .

My story is posted over on the "affected you" thread.  After seeing BBM, I began searching for the only great love of my life.  It had been fifty years.  Just recently, after weeks of searching, I found that Billy had died in 1993.

How do I cope?  I'm not sure that I do yet.  Writing about Billy has been the most important way.  Somehow I feel this sense of urgency, like if I don't do it quickly, I might forget.  After posting some of the story on this forum, I've begun writing a complete memoir.  Remembering, that's how I cope. 

There's no one in my life who even knows about Billy.  So that means not a single person that I can talk to.  But I have found tremendous support in a most unlikely place.  Auntie's Diner, over in the Meet and Greet section.  A virtual alliance of caring, understanding people.  They take my mind off of me.  That's good.

Paul / Mejack

Since May, so much has happened.  The support I have received from this forum has been overwhelming.  Then, too, there are the friendships forged at the Texas BBQ, and the encouragement I've received from you all.

Mourning a Loved One.  As some of you know, this past Friday I visited Billy's grave.  It had been seven months since I learned of his death.  My friend Widge (WDJ) who I met on this forum, met me in Atlanta and we went together to the cemetery.  How fortunate I am to have the shoulder of a friend. How thankful I am for "Brokeback Mountain".  Without the film, I would never have begun the search for Billy. I would never have known nor read his last words to me. Now, finally, I have been able to "put things in their place."

I don't think of it as closure. I've never wanted closure.  To me, that has the connotation of wanting to forget.  I'll never forget.  I'll never stop loving him. But I fell a real sense of completion now, and that sense of emptiness seems to have subsided too.

Paul Mejack   
Precious memories, how they linger,  how they ever flood my soul.
In the stillness of the midnight,  memories from the past unfold.

Offline fritzkep

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Re: Mourning Someone Who Has Died
« Reply #247 on: October 24, 2006, 07:21:54 PM »
Bless you, Paul, and thank you.

Werd ich zum Augenblicke sagen, "Verweile doch! Du bist so schön..."

Offline paintedshoes

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Re: Mourning Someone Who Has Died
« Reply #248 on: October 24, 2006, 07:46:26 PM »
"That sense of emptiness seems to have subsided, too."

Oh, my Paul.  My heart is always with you, Elder Brother.
"Miracles do happen, dear friend(s).  Miracles are real."- Boris 
"There are only two things we know: the cosmos exists and we are imbedded within the cosmos.  Everything else is speculation and discovery."- Caithness's dad
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Offline conny

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Re: Mourning Someone Who Has Died
« Reply #249 on: October 25, 2006, 12:08:45 AM »
paul i`m happy for you that you got the chance of saying goodbye to billy and have some peace with it
"we are one,but we are not the same"   U2

Offline desertrat

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Re: Mourning Someone Who Has Died
« Reply #250 on: October 25, 2006, 12:13:21 AM »
paul, it is a blessing that you were able to find peace. i'm sure billy would have wanted that.
Minds are like parachutes... they both work better when opened.

Offline Nax

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Re: Mourning Someone Who Has Died
« Reply #251 on: October 25, 2006, 07:50:32 AM »
Sweet Paul, I'm so glad you did it. Everything has it's place.

Offline BrokenOkie

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Re: Mourning Someone Who Has Died
« Reply #252 on: October 25, 2006, 11:44:24 AM »
Paul - My apologies for using the word 'closure' in other threads in reference to your visit to Billy's resting place.  I didn't realize that it could have a negative connotation for you.  It was meant as an expression of 'completion', certainly not to imply that you could or ever would desire to forget.  For a life situation that haunts me, the 'closure' or 'completion' that I yearn for will never be possible.   

Offline Mejack

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Re: Mourning Someone Who Has Died
« Reply #253 on: October 25, 2006, 12:19:37 PM »
Sweet Paul, I'm so glad you did it. Everything has it's place.

That though, from you, has meant so much to me.
It describes my feeling exactly.
Paul
Precious memories, how they linger,  how they ever flood my soul.
In the stillness of the midnight,  memories from the past unfold.

Offline Mejack

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Re: Mourning Someone Who Has Died
« Reply #254 on: October 25, 2006, 12:21:04 PM »
Paul - My apologies for using the word 'closure' in other threads in reference to your visit to Billy's resting place.  I didn't realize that it could have a negative connotation for you.  It was meant as an expression of 'completion', certainly not to imply that you could or ever would desire to forget.  For a life situation that haunts me, the 'closure' or 'completion' that I yearn for will never be possible.   

I understand completely.  (((((hugs))))
Precious memories, how they linger,  how they ever flood my soul.
In the stillness of the midnight,  memories from the past unfold.