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Author Topic: Caring for others with chronic illnesses  (Read 236833 times)

Offline dejavu

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Re: Caring for others with chronic illnesses
« Reply #960 on: December 10, 2011, 07:34:49 AM »
(((Daniela)))

My thoughts are with you and your father.  Hoping he will be able to come home soon.
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Offline mcnell1120

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Re: Caring for others with chronic illnesses
« Reply #961 on: December 10, 2011, 09:21:27 AM »
For all our moms and dads.....(((((((hugs))))))))))

Dear Lord with all your Grace,please keep our parents safe and healthy...keep them strong!




so hard to have aging parents... :-\
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Offline fritzkep

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Re: Caring for others with chronic illnesses
« Reply #962 on: December 10, 2011, 09:56:25 AM »
Hope he recovers soon, Daniela.

Amen, Nellie.

Werd ich zum Augenblicke sagen, "Verweile doch! Du bist so schön..."

Offline Sason

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Re: Caring for others with chronic illnesses
« Reply #963 on: December 10, 2011, 12:12:04 PM »
Best wishes for you dad, Daniela!!

What a scare, I'm glad he's on the mend already.

Düva pööp is a förce of natüre

Offline Sason

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Re: Caring for others with chronic illnesses
« Reply #964 on: December 10, 2011, 12:12:38 PM »
so hard to have aging parents... :-\


No kidding.... :-\

Düva pööp is a förce of natüre

Offline Sason

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Re: Caring for others with chronic illnesses
« Reply #965 on: December 10, 2011, 12:56:02 PM »
Update on my parents:

My mum is home, in the new apartment. There's still plenty to do, unpacking and getting things sorted, and making the place cozy. Still no curtains e.g. But there's slowly progress, I try to do a little each time I visit.

The home care seems to work fairly well, to my enormous relief.
The girls (of different ages) who come to help her are all very sweet, and from what I've seen they take good care of her, on the whole. They are there about 5 times a day, and a couple of times at night as well.

She also has home rehab a couple of times a week. Three times a week she goes to daycare, to meet other people and to allow my dad to have some time on his own.

My mum is totally dependent on others, she can't even move her wheelchair a meter on her own. That is one of the things she's working on with the home rehab PT.

My dad is very patient with her, wheels her around and gets things for her.

Under the circumstances, they seem to have adjusted pretty well, and their daily life is pretty much under control.

But the overall responsibility is totally relying on me. I organize everything when they're going somewere, arrange for the mobility service, home care, that they bring what they need, and stay with them wherever they're going. I arrange for my mum to go to the doctor, audionom, optician, speach therapist, take her there, get her prescription medicines, and stay in touch with the home nurse. I take her to town to do shopping, and have to plan it very carefully, since you can't go everywhere in a wheelchair. I make sure she has clothes for the season, since a lot of her old clothes are not very suitable for wheelchair use, or very hard for her helpers to take on and off.
My mum doesn't always have a realistic notion of what she needs, so I have to have it for her. And make sure she gets it.

I remind my dad of dozens of things, and have to do it very carefully, as he's easily offended by it.

Since neither of them is capable of taking the full responsibility or planning ahead or arranging things, all of this relies on me.

There isn't one single day at work where I don't make at least one phonecall regarding my parents, often more.

Everybody tells me to take care of myself too, and I try to. I'm so happy I was able to go to Chicago in November, I really needed to get away.

Düva pööp is a förce of natüre

Offline Sara B

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Re: Caring for others with chronic illnesses
« Reply #966 on: December 10, 2011, 01:04:43 PM »
Oh ((((Sonja))))

I know you're not asking for sympathy, but it must be very hard.  And with your brother so far away....  When my mother was becoming more and more dependent, at least she was living next door to us, and I had Michael too.

Offline Sason

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Re: Caring for others with chronic illnesses
« Reply #967 on: December 10, 2011, 01:26:26 PM »
Thank you, Sara.

The extreme stress of their move and my mum's first weeks at home is over, and if nothing takes a turn for the worse, it's sort of manageable the way it is right now.

But my dad has caused several crisis already, since he doesn't always know what my mum needs, or his own limitations. He's trying to do things he can't, or shouldn't, and I'm afraid it will happen again.

Yes, it is hard. In a way it's like having responsibility for children, only much harder.

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Offline janjo

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Re: Caring for others with chronic illnesses
« Reply #968 on: December 10, 2011, 04:27:31 PM »
Glad to hear that you are coping so well, Sonja, and that everyone has as much quality of life as is possible, but it must be a terrific responsibility for you, and such hard work. Do take care of yourself. :-* :-* :-*
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Offline CellarDweller115

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Re: Caring for others with chronic illnesses
« Reply #969 on: December 10, 2011, 05:02:04 PM »
Sonja, I'm glad to hear your parents are doing well and adjusting, I hope the situation continues to improve.

Daniela, I'm sorry to hear about your father, I hope he returns to his schedule soon!

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Re: Caring for others with chronic illnesses
« Reply #970 on: December 10, 2011, 07:09:02 PM »
My mum is totally dependent on others, she can't even move her wheelchair a meter on her own. That is one of the things she's working on with the home rehab PT.

My dad is very patient with her, wheels her around and gets things for her.

 Sonja, this must be very exhausting.  I did wonder, though, if your Mom could improve enough to use one of those Jazzies, or motorized wheelchairs.  They can be used in a home or outside.  Right now, though, it doesn't seem she would be able to concentrate enough. But maybe later. Am not sure if they are covered, in Sweden, by the health care system, but they are, here.

 Meanwhile, I wish you well, along with everyone else taking care of their parents.  You have the love and support of all of us !

Offline killersmom

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Re: Caring for others with chronic illnesses
« Reply #971 on: December 10, 2011, 08:29:40 PM »
I am so glad your dad is home, Nellie! What wonderful news and so very glad that there is to be no chemo or radiation.
So very happy for your dad, you and your family!
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Offline killersmom

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Re: Caring for others with chronic illnesses
« Reply #972 on: December 10, 2011, 08:32:03 PM »
(((Mia))).
I am continuing to pray and send thoughts to and for your mom.
"Life can only be understood backwards. Unfortunately, it must be lived forward."
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Offline killersmom

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Re: Caring for others with chronic illnesses
« Reply #973 on: December 10, 2011, 08:38:26 PM »
Daniella, I have had two attacks of pancreatitis, and the pain is far worse than anything I have experienced, so I know how your dad was suffering. I was much younger too, so it know it had to have been so bad for him. I am so glad he has responded so well and that hopefully he will be able to be home soon and get back into his routine.

I am thinking and praying for him and you and your family.
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Offline killersmom

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Re: Caring for others with chronic illnesses
« Reply #974 on: December 10, 2011, 08:44:37 PM »
(((((Sonja)))))
I know how hard and stressful it has been for you and the situation with your parents.
I know you are doing everything right for them.
I am hoping settle more for you and them.

I am so glad you were able to make it to Chicago as well. it was great being able to spend time with you1
I know you needed it.
"Life can only be understood backwards. Unfortunately, it must be lived forward."
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