Photo Captioning Fun Vol 8

[fritzkep]

 

[gnash]

beans is enough



jack: i love you… even if you fart like a clydesdale.

[Flyboy]

NOW, that is LOVE, for sure!! 

[gnash]

gyllentwist



ma twist: could you give me a ride to sweden?
i’d like to visit some of my distant relatives.
i’ll knit you some långa underkläder
in whatever color you’d like —
with or without the pouch.

[gnash]

big top herders



jack: what say you and me run off
and join the circus? you already
walk a tight rope half the time
and lord knows how much i
love to juggle your balls.

[royandronnie]

"Lil darlin, thing is, once you pop out a puppy or two, yer ugly bits gone a be stretched out like a kindergarten trampoline.
Ain't no guy gone a settle for a wad a wet paper towels when he can have a Chinese finger trap. So you better make sure you can suck a golf ball
through a garden hose like Jack could. Or else get you an Amazon subscription for Crisco. Course, you could get lucky
and he comes back from the oil fields with some hunk who's bi."

[gnash]

  …nothin like a father who cares!

[gnash]

bada bing bada boom



ennis: whatsamatter for you? i break
a my back for years to make you
happy… you drive a me crazy,
jackie! you bitch about the
weather, itsa too cold! i let
you drool onna my gabagool,
but now itsa smelly! you used to
make a me happy, now i get oogatz!

jack: wait. i’m really not
feeling the italian accent.

ennis: i didn’t think so. shall i go
back to the scottish accent?

jack: umm… let’s try asian.
can you do vietnamese?

[gnash]

you’ve been warned



the basque: be careful when you whip it
out to pee — there’s poison oak near
some of the pine trees. but worse
than that is the mistletoe. it’s
all over the place, and jack
is superstitious and will
sucker-punch you
from below.

[royandronnie]

you’ve been warned



the basque: be careful when you whip it
out to pee — there’s poison oak near
some of the pine trees. but worse
than that is the mistletoe. it’s
all over the place, and jack
is superstitious and will
sucker-punch you
from below.

 

Hmm. "Suck," plus "punch…" Wonder--does he know how to use a whip? And what's the Crisco allowance?

[royandronnie]

"Damn it, Ennis, I wish that photographer would get on with it! I been lyin here on this damp grass so long my right leg is numb. And I'm fuckin freezin."

"You're cute, Jack, but I got a say, you complain more hours than there are in a day."

"Tell you what, lover boy--you're the one gone a be complainin if this makes my bursitis act up tonight."

[gnash]

externalized avocadophobia



jack: so is that a yes or a no?




ennis: sure, i’ll go to brunch, but i ain’t eatin no
goddam avocado toast with everything bagel
seasoning. what the hell you think i am?

[gnash]

it’s the thots that count



jack: can’t believe you brought kneepads.
you remembered my bouts with bursitis.

[gnash]

cacio e pepé le pew


 
jack: i can’t believe aguirre made you camp tender.
he KNOWS i wanna be a chef, too. last year i won
the best upcoming wyoming chef award for my
blackened braised skunk — with gruyère and
and peppercorn — served in a bread bowl!

[royandronnie]

cacio e pepé le pew

 
jack: i can’t believe aguirre made you camp tender.
he KNOWS i wanna be a chef, too. last year i won
the best upcoming wyoming chef award for my
blackened braised skunk — with gruyère and
and peppercorn — served in a bread bowl!

"…and if you're wondering how I caught a skunk, let's just say it AIN'T cat piss that little tent smells like. It's worse. --Plus, of course, my Pepé le Pew costume really helped."