The Ultimate Brokeback Forum

Author Topic: Mourning Someone Who Has Died  (Read 689758 times)

Offline Ruby

  • Honorary Scandinavian
  • Obsessed
  • *****
  • Posts: 5362
  • and here we.....go
Re: Mourning Someone Who Has Died
« Reply #270 on: November 17, 2006, 12:29:02 PM »
 (((Neil)))


I always find this comforting, even if I always cry when I read it;   :-\ :)

"All is Well.  Death is nothing at all. I have only slipped away into the next room. I am I, and you are you. Whatever we were to each other, that we still are. Call me by my old familiar name, speak to me in the easy way which you always used. Put no difference in your tone, wear no forced air of solemnity or sorrow. Laugh as we always laughed at the little jokes we enjoyed together. Pray, smile, think of me, pray for me. Let my name be ever the household word that it always was, let it be spoken without effect without the trace of a shadow on it. Life means all that it ever meant. It is the same as it ever was; there is unbroken continuity. Why should I be out of mind because I am out of sight? I am waiting for you, for an interval, somewhere very near, just round the corner. All is well. "
                'shimmering golden silk threaded with starlight' (Shades of Grey by Midwest Girl)

Offline bass51

  • Obsessed
  • *****
  • Posts: 5437
Re: Mourning Someone Who Has Died
« Reply #271 on: November 17, 2006, 02:45:18 PM »
Neil, there's nothing I can say or do that would undo your loss, but you have my sympathy. Both my parents are gone, and I know what the hurt is like.

Not to piggyback but I am in this same situation as Lance, my parents are both gone as well, for many years now. It seems a whole other life ago. My prayers and sympathy are with you, Neil, for strength for you.
You are a good man.
Honesty is such a lonely word...

Offline Lola

  • Membership_deactivated
  • Obsessed
  • *****
  • Posts: 10471
Re: Mourning Someone Who Has Died
« Reply #272 on: November 17, 2006, 02:48:40 PM »
Neil, there's nothing I can say or do that would undo your loss, but you have my sympathy. Both my parents are gone, and I know what the hurt is like.

Not to piggyback but I am in this same situation as Lance, my parents are both gone as well, for many years now. It seems a whole other life ago. My prayers and sympathy are with you, Neil, for strength for you.
You are a good man.

Can I say the same, mine are gone, but NEVER forgotten.  And there are days when it seems a life time ago. 

And Ruby I read that at my Mom's funeral, it is beautiful.  I take great solice in that, I hope you can too Neil.

(((HUGS)))
 
FUNGURL

Offline CellarDweller115

  • Faithful Friend
  • Administrator
  • Obsessed
  • ******
  • Posts: 316781
  • Official Diner "Recapper"!
Re: Mourning Someone Who Has Died
« Reply #273 on: November 17, 2006, 03:02:35 PM »



Neil, you and your family are in my thoughts and prayers at this difficult time.  Feel free to send me an email or PM if you need anything.

Offline Rob in Puyallup

  • Yogis Boo-Boo
  • Obsessed
  • *****
  • Posts: 12813
  • Ten Year Forum Member. Do I get a pin?
Re: Mourning Someone Who Has Died
« Reply #274 on: November 17, 2006, 08:04:42 PM »
Warm hugs... and tears for you, Neil,

Rob
Old Brokeback got me good...

Offline ImEnnisShesJack

  • Obsessed
  • *****
  • Posts: 4347
Re: Mourning Someone Who Has Died
« Reply #275 on: November 17, 2006, 09:29:34 PM »
Carol and I send our love and sympathy to you, Neil, and your family at this time.

ANything I say will sound trite, but I mean it sincerely.

xoxo
H.
"And when he shall die,
Take him and cut him out in little stars,
And he will make the face of heaven so fine
That all the world will be in love with night."
~~Heath Ledger 1979-2008~~

Carol8159@yahoo.com

Offline paintedshoes

  • Movie Lover
  • Obsessed
  • *****
  • Posts: 26276
  • Well, I won't! "Til the next time, my friends!"
Re: Mourning Someone Who Has Died
« Reply #276 on: November 17, 2006, 09:51:16 PM »
Dearest Neil,

Please know that my thoughts are with you and K and all of your family at this sad time.

"Miracles do happen, dear friend(s).  Miracles are real."- Boris 
"There are only two things we know: the cosmos exists and we are imbedded within the cosmos.  Everything else is speculation and discovery."- Caithness's dad
Ing's space:Ingyllenhaal+Ingstier+Ing-Myster+Ingwer+IngCannesBabe+darlING

Offline Nax

  • The Captain Underpants Enigma
  • Tech Support
  • Obsessed
  • *****
  • Posts: 16012
  • A rose by any other name would smell as sweet.
    • naxfun.com
Re: Mourning Someone Who Has Died
« Reply #277 on: November 18, 2006, 11:37:29 AM »
Thank you all for your kind words off support, they mean a lot to me.

N.

Offline brianr

  • Obsessed
  • *****
  • Posts: 8044
Re: Mourning Someone Who Has Died
« Reply #278 on: November 18, 2006, 08:12:57 PM »
Dear Neil
My thoughts are with you as yours were for me nearly 5 months ago. The lovely poem "I catch your smile on someone's face" which you sent at that time has been regularly in my mind ever since. I do pray all our loving thoughts even from the other side of the world may comfort you now.
Hugs
 Brian

Offline phrag3

  • Expert
  • ****
  • Posts: 467
  • I remember.
Re: Mourning Someone Who Has Died
« Reply #279 on: November 19, 2006, 10:46:42 AM »
The Holidays are always hard for me...they're killers for everyone else too I"m sure...you miss them more and more and it hurts. The good memories are all you have. But when it comes to someone you never heard,someone you never had a chance to see grow up.It's so hard....I never told her I loved her,I never held her in my arms...I never heard her say "mommy". Shit....I thought it was suppose to get easier....I tell people it's okay and comfort them,but I can't convince myself...I can't comfort myself. When I went to see a psychic 3 weeks after I lost my baby,she told me that I may see her in my dreams...that she will come to me in visions,and that one day as I hold my son in my arms under the Christmas tree,she will be there with us...I wonder if she really did.

I take a picture of my Christmas tree every year....the very first year I started doing that,the picture taken had a white glow,a cloud or spot of some sort at the bottom of the tree. I showed that picture to a friend who develops pictures all the time...without telling her what I was thinking...she looked at it and said it wasn't a defect...she looked at the negatives,looked at the other pictures from the same roll.....nothing...then she told me, "Nellie,I don't know if you believe this stuff or not,but this usually means that you caught a spirit".....I stared at her and sobbed...we cried together when she had just realized what this meant. My little angel came to visit me...it was true what the psychic had said.....now if only she would appear to me in a dream....maybe this year....*sigh*

Nellie

Nellie,

Your little Angel was there.

Here is my story.

When Scott died I was out of town for work. Once I got home and was trying to go to sleep, I heard him call out my name, and then the toilet flushed!

You see, Scott passed away in the bathroom and I knew then that the last word he spoke, was my name. His spirit said it again once I was home so that I would know this for a fact.

A few weeks after his Memorial Service a friend of his called me to talk. During that conversation she told me that she saw Scott at the Service and that he was standing at the front of the Church, to the right of the podium. I was glad to know that he was there to see all of the friends that he had and to hear the joyous music from the two large choirs assembled in his honour.

One thing that I had requested was for the Service to be videoed so that I could watch it later (knowing that I would remember little of the event).

Many months later I got a call from one of his Sister's telling me that I needed to come over to their house as they were watching the video (and were the first to do so).

And there, on the video, on the right side of the podium, was a light. A light that pulsed as the processional song was played. The song was "To where you are" by Josh Groban. All who have viewed this video cannot explain this light - other than it was Scott. I believe.

So Nellie - our Angels show up when we least expect it.

Know that they are always there for us. Keeping us safe.

love your way

Dan

Who can say for certain
Maybe you’re still here
I feel you all around me
Your memories so clear

Deep in the stillness
I can hear you speak
You’re still an inspiration
Can it be (? )
That you are mine
Forever love
And you are watching over me from up above

Fly me up to where you are
Beyond the distant star
I wish upon tonight
To see you smile
If only for awhile to know you’re there
A breath away’s not far
To where you are

Are you gently sleeping
Here inside my dream
And isn’t faith believing
All power can’t be seen

As my heart holds you
Just one beat away
I cherish all you gave me everyday
’cause you are mine
Forever love
Watching me from up above

And I believe
That angels breathe
And that love will live on and never leave

Fly me up
To where you are
Beyond the distant star
I wish upon tonight
To see you smile
If only for awhile
To know you’re there
A breath away’s not far
To where you are

I know you’re there
A breath away’s not far
To where you are



Offline mcnell1120

  • Vida Loca
  • Obsessed
  • *****
  • Posts: 28784
  • Footsteps in my life....leave memories in my heart
Re: Mourning Someone Who Has Died
« Reply #280 on: November 19, 2006, 03:38:13 PM »

Nellie,

Your little Angel was there.

Here is my story.

When Scott died I was out of town for work. Once I got home and was trying to go to sleep, I heard him call out my name, and then the toilet flushed!

You see, Scott passed away in the bathroom and I knew then that the last word he spoke, was my name. His spirit said it again once I was home so that I would know this for a fact.

A few weeks after his Memorial Service a friend of his called me to talk. During that conversation she told me that she saw Scott at the Service and that he was standing at the front of the Church, to the right of the podium. I was glad to know that he was there to see all of the friends that he had and to hear the joyous music from the two large choirs assembled in his honour.

One thing that I had requested was for the Service to be videoed so that I could watch it later (knowing that I would remember little of the event).

Many months later I got a call from one of his Sister's telling me that I needed to come over to their house as they were watching the video (and were the first to do so).

And there, on the video, on the right side of the podium, was a light. A light that pulsed as the processional song was played. The song was "To where you are" by Josh Groban. All who have viewed this video cannot explain this light - other than it was Scott. I believe.

So Nellie - our Angels show up when we least expect it.

Know that they are always there for us. Keeping us safe.

love your way

Dan


OMG...Dan,

You have no idea how comforting this is for me....your story made me cry and brought the hairs on my arms to stand up...thank you so much. I know that song,have Josh Groban's CD....*sigh*

How awesome for us to have this...our personal guardian angel...I remember when my son was in and out of the hospital,his asthma and pneumonia was always out of control ...from 6 months of age until he reached 9 years old...I prayed to Ashely,told her to take care of her little brother...that warm feeling I would feel and knowing she was really listening to me,somewhere...he now has been taken off all medications....asthma free...*knocks on wood*....is that possible?......anyway.....God bless

Nellie
RICKY MARTIN ,tu eres mi Kiki !

Offline conny

  • seagirl
  • Obsessed
  • *****
  • Posts: 16511
    • forthejoyoflife
Re: Mourning Someone Who Has Died
« Reply #281 on: November 20, 2006, 09:15:18 AM »
Dan thanks for you story,and wow what a powerfull spirit Scott must be!!!
and thanks for the beautiful poem,!!
"we are one,but we are not the same"   U2

Offline phrag3

  • Expert
  • ****
  • Posts: 467
  • I remember.
Re: Mourning Someone Who Has Died
« Reply #282 on: November 20, 2006, 03:49:56 PM »
You know, since I bought the new Josh Groban CD "Awake" , and have been listening to it, I have had such powerful memories and sadness over Scott's passing, the likes of which have not occurred for some time.

Josh Groban was one of Scott's favourite Artists, and as you know, one of his pieces was used at Scott's Memorial.

I guess his music provides an avenue to my soul, that still aches for Scott.

Many tears have been shed over the last few days. I'm OK with all of this. It's almost like I needed to be reminded of how much he meant to me.

He really was my Soul-Mate, and I doubt that I will ever have that strong a connection with another.

It's not that I'm not moving on with my life. I am.

But I'm starting to realize that Scott will always be with me. Looking over my shoulder and looking out for me.

Thank you, dear Scott.


love,

Dan

Offline fritzkep

  • German Louisiana Virginia Dude
  • Global Moderator
  • Obsessed
  • ******
  • Posts: 167898
  • Wie geht's, y'all?
Re: Mourning Someone Who Has Died
« Reply #283 on: November 20, 2006, 03:54:23 PM »
Bless you, Dan and Scott.

Werd ich zum Augenblicke sagen, "Verweile doch! Du bist so schön..."

Offline mcnell1120

  • Vida Loca
  • Obsessed
  • *****
  • Posts: 28784
  • Footsteps in my life....leave memories in my heart
Re: Mourning Someone Who Has Died
« Reply #284 on: November 20, 2006, 05:03:01 PM »
But when it comes to someone you never heard,someone you never had a chance to see grow up.It's so hard....I never told her I loved her,I never held her in my arms...I never heard her say "mommy". Shit....I thought it was suppose to get easier....I tell people it's okay and comfort them,but I can't convince myself...I can't comfort myself.
...

Nell, I'm sorry not to have remembered this program sooner. In Hinsdale, which mustn't be far from you as it's a suburb of Chicago, there's a program called Still Missed. It is a service of the hospital; it has been run for almost 20 years by the same woman. It was designed for parents and other family members who have lost children to miscarriage, stillbirth, or early infant death.
Every October they have a service of remembrance, always with some special way of acknowledging the little ones. One year they gave each mother a flower to hold - pink for a girl, blue for a boy, white if the gender was not known - to place on a special table.
This year, each family got a little dove to pin to a banner ...

Rosie Roose started the program because she felt that lack of acknowledgement when she lost a baby girl of her own a few months before the birth was due.

http://www.pioneerlocal.com/hinsdale/news/111247,hi-missed-102606-s1.article

I wanted to thank you for this....I've been checking it out...

Hugs

Nellie
RICKY MARTIN ,tu eres mi Kiki !